


legends live forever

by neobionic



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Rock Stars, jaehyun rising actor in korea, yuta successful rockstar in japan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-30
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:13:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24420361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neobionic/pseuds/neobionic
Summary: yuta has it all - fame, money, fans all over the world - but he wants more. hatching a brilliant scheme leads him to the equally ambitous jung jaehyun, and maybe yuta ends up with more than he can chew.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Nakamoto Yuta
Comments: 37
Kudos: 90





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> yuta's life and career in this fic is inspired by miyavi, so feel free to check out his music if you want an idea of what this rockstar!yuta would sound like

he stretches the last tone, trembling the whammy, drawing it out to a dirty longing wail, flowing from his fingers and through the speakers, filling the air all the way up to the tall, looming ceiling of the arena. it fades out as if it dreads dying; stuttering, coughing its way through another couple of seconds.

the crowd isn’t silent, but it feels that way compared to how it erupts when he finally drops his hands. his vision is a wet blur, eyes half blinded by spotlights and flashing letters spelling out his name. he can barely feel his sore fingers, his raw throat, the sweat running down his back. all he feels is the vibrations from the roar of the audience; the eyes fixed on him; the love sparking like electricity over his skin, tingling warm through his veins.

he stands at the edge of the stage, drunk with euphoria, spreads his arms and lets it wash over him. the din seems to fade, morphing into a blissful white noise filling his head. his eyes slide shut. for a minute, time and place ceases to be. his body is nothing but an ephemeral glob of atoms.

all there is, the only thing that matters - is this. this moment.

> _March 8th, 2022_
> 
> **Rising star Nakamoto Yuta prepares for comeback with new album**
> 
> After completing his successful world tour in December Nakamoto Yuta has been laying low, reportedly taking some well-deserved time off. But his fans, who have been forced to make do with the occasional Instagram update and Yuta’s semi-regular live streams, will not have to wait for fresh content much longer. A new album is current in the works.
> 
> “We’re in the recording stage, but no release date has been set,” confirms a representative for NCT Records. “Yuta is excited to show a new side of himself and hopes his fans will anticipate his return.”
> 
> Debuting with Cherry Bomb in 2017, the Korean-raised Japanese artist quickly gained traction both with fans and critics due to his innovative, guitar-heavy tracks and showy stage performances. Ever since, his career trajectory has pointed steadily upwards. Despite his young age, the 26-year-old has already built an impressive discography with four albums and several hit singles, and he beats his own sales record with every new release. His experimental and versatile style manages to marry pop and rock and appeal to both broader audiences as well as his ever-growing, dedicated fanbase.

the alarm goes off at seven thirty. yuta rolls over in his large bed, fumbling for the phone on the nightstand. he groans, eyes crusty, his whole body is telling him to blow it off and go back to sleep. when was the last time he woke up this early? _i’m nakamoto fucking yuta. what are they gonna do, fire me?_

still, he drags himself up on the second snooze. it’s rare that his job even remotely resembles the average nine to five gig. he might as well try to enjoy the change of pace.

he stumbles into his en suite, wondering if he has time to shower, then deciding that he does. the gigantic mirror over the sinks bathes his sorry reflection in golden, glamorous light - wrinkles under his eyes, sheet imprints on his chest, long dark hair standing in every direction.

yuta stops by the counter, drags a hand through his bangs, gives his mirror twin a practiced smirk. there it is - the dark, piercing gaze that makes his fans go crazy. he stands back, turning to an angle, eyes gliding over his own reflection. lean muscles, dark grey ink decorating his skin, specks of silver by his nipples and belly button.

even when he looks like shit he looks hot.

freshened up, he throws on some clothes from the walk-in closet and continues out into the kitchen, which is not so much a kitchen as the cooking and eating part of the generous, open-plan living area. it’s all chrome and black polished rock; dual-fuel stovetops, hot air oven, a grill, several appliances yuta barely knows what they do. it feels kind of dumb having a kitchen like this when he rarely ever cooks, but all high end apartments seem to assume that you are, or employ, a gourmet chef.

either way, that was not on his list of priorities when hunting real estate. he likes the location, the security and facilities of a gated complex, the view - he leans against the bar countertop, taking in the panoramic display of a cloudy morning tokyo visible through the full-length windows covering the opposite wall.

he doesn’t think he’ll ever get tired of that view.

it was pricey, of course, more so than necessary. he could have gotten something less posh; upgraded over time. but he figured he’d grow into it. he has accomplished a lot, climbed higher than most will ever reach, but he has never been one to settle. he’s not done yet. he’s just getting started.

his empty stomach grumbles. he opens the huge fridge to find it empty save from some scrappy leftovers, condiments and sad-looking vegetables at the bottom. yuta purses his lips. he’ll have to pick up some breakfast on the way. and remember to order groceries.

he’s in his study, packing his laptop and trying to find all relevant papers, notes and scribbled post-its when his phone beeps. a text from maru; _I’m here. You up?_

yuta isn’t sure if he should be offended by that. he quickly types back; _omw_

he takes the elevator the 14 stories down to the basement garage, where a familiar car is waiting for him.

“mornin’,” maru calls as yuta loads his bags and one of his fenders into the trunk.

“morning,” he mumbles back, stifling a yawn as he climbs into the passenger seat to find a take-out bag is sitting on the dashboard, a tall paper tumbler in the cup holder.

maru grins at him from behind the wheel. “figured you might be hungry.”

yuta chuckles as he reaches for a sip. “dude. you know me.”

“all too well.”

nakamaru has been his manager for close to four years. one of yuta’s deepest fears is that maru is going to quit his job and go to the tabloids to release a fat, juicy tell-all spilling yuta’s dirty secrets.

the role of manager is an odd job, to begin with. a mix of boss, secretary, chauffeur, butler, bodyguard, friend and parent.

maru has helped sneak girls into yuta’s hotel room. held yuta’s hair back when he was wasted and bent over the toilet bowl. without hesitation used himself as a human shield between yuta and mobs of overly enthusiastic fans. took a punch for him when yuta got a little too involved with an amateur critic. has screamed with him in joy and held him when he cried.

luckily maru has signed the mandatory NDA, but he’s also an incredibly loyal person. he’s in his late thirties, unmarried and single, because - let’s be real - being the glorified babysitter of a rockstar is more a lifestyle than a job. yuta sometimes has to remind himself that their relationship is a professional one. maru is getting paid for what he does - rather handsomely, too. maru is not his dad, or his older brother.

they’re the first to arrive at the studio, which yuta takes pride in. he’s the main character after all; the leader of the band.

at the moment, they have ogawa on drums, kojima on bass and inoue on keyboard. ogawa and kojima have been regulars for two years by now, but inoue is a recent addition. he was casted right before the latest tour when their former keyboardist got caught up in scheduling conflicts, and yuta drilled him through an intense musical bootcamp to get him up to speed with the material.

finding a new band member is always a gamble, but yuta thinks he's gonna try to keep inoue around. he's a good guy - young, skilled, but not too keen on the spotlight. doesn't ask for more than a paycheck and his name in fine print at the back of the CD booklet.

and then there's yuto, of course, on second guitar. yuto has been with him from the beginning. he always has a finger in the composing and arrangements; writes some of the lyrics; does back-up vocals and rap. yuto is not replaceable.

yuta goes through his files and papers while the others pile in and set up, jotting down notes and tweaks in the margins. they’ve already practiced for a couple weeks, but the creative process continues to the very end. when everyone is ready and waiting for him yuta downs the last of his americano and shoots up.

“okay,” he says, handing out note sheets. “i wanna start with _dragonfly._ ”

yuta stumbles back into his apartment past eight pm, throat sore and head spinning. what he would most like to do is crack open a beer and lie on the couch to watch something dumb on TV until he falls asleep, but yuta is nothing if not disciplined. he knows what he needs, and he has looks to maintain. so he changes into something lighter and takes the stairs down to the building’s private gym on the tenth floor.

seated on an exercycle, he props up his phone on the display to begin his daily scan of the internet.

first he goes through his email, twitter notifs, insta comments (both on his private and official account), and youtube channel. checks his stats: followers, subscribers, views, streams, likes. on a busy day, these are the essentials. but when he has time he likes to go deeper.

he continues with his fansites, forums and discussion boards - all excitement and speculation about the comeback. some new fan-taken pics from a couple weeks back, diligently edited to smooth out his skin to airbrushed perfection. gifs from his latest instalive. a text post gushing about his smooth vocals and profound lyrics has gained a lot of notes. yuta grins to himself.

he taps in usernames and passwords without having to pause to think. a lot of fandom hotspots are members-only, so he’s been forced to make secret accounts, posing as one of many nondescript fan who don’t comment or make contributions. you gotta keep track of your audience, after all.

next, he browses through the new fanfic posts. yuta enjoys being an inspiration to his fans. since his debut, he has generated quite a collection of amature literature. a lot of it follows the formula of yuta falling in love with a fan; locking eyes in the crowd and seeking her out afterwards, sweeping her away into his private life of fame and glamour.

some stories feature his old bandmates from high school or other celebs he occasionally interacts with. but most of them are about him and yuto; being secretly in love and/or fucking in various adventurous places. oh yes, yuta has seen it all - every kink and sexual deviance represented. but it’s not like he actually reads them. (that often.)

of course, yuta doesn’t discourage the romantic interpretations of their relationship. it’s all part of the game, the product he sells. he makes sure to touch yuto a little more than necessary in front of the cameras - putting an arm around him, a hand on the thigh, trying to peck him on the cheek - even if yuto isn’t always very happy about being the object of performative affection. yuta is much too fond of the reactions it gets to stop doing it. why not give the fans what they want, when you can?

but yuto gets it. yuta’s career is what pays his bills as well.

anyway, the downtime between promotions is slow also for the fandom. there’s only so much to talk about or create media of when he’s not putting out new content. yuta is only halfway through his cardio when he’s done with the usual searches, so he moves on to one of the entertainment news sites bookmarked in his browser.

there are no new articles on him, and barely any new comments on the recent ones. yuta wipes sweat off his forehead and starts scrolling through the front page instead. you gotta keep track of your competition as well.

so-and-so have been cast in a new drama, old has-been is publishing a biography, boyband member leaves group after smoking scandal, pop star’s single is a hit, female idol releases risque photobook - the usual.

he starts spacing out, thinking about heading over to the weights instead, when something catches his attention. he almost passes the article and has to scroll back up.

famous male actor confirms to be dating other male actor.

 _huh._ yuta clicks on the title, skims through the text and then scrolls down to the comments. plenty of upvotes and positive reactions. hundreds of supportive comments. some negative ones too, of course, but most of them downvoted and argued against.

his feet slow, finally coming to a stop on the pedals. he googles the actors’ names, finding several similar articles from other sites. same story - they met on set, been going out for a couple months, yada-yada. floods of heart emojis, well-wishes and congratulations, fangirls gushing over how cute they look together.

yuta picks up his phone and sits back on the bike, balancing on the seat with his eyes fixed on the screen. suggested links and tags shows similar pieces on the topic. same-sex couples, coming-outs, queer characters in dramas and movies. yuta pinches at his chin.

he doesn’t get to the weights that evening.

yuto sits on yuta’s couch, picking at the strings of an old guitar while yuta sets the coffee table, unloading styrofoam containers out of a labelled plastic bag. yuta recognizes the melody from one of the new songs, but it deviates here and there; a different pace, a different tone, slipping into a potential harmony.

the week has continued in much the same fashion as the first day; early mornings and long hours in the stuffy recording booth. you know you’re spending a lot of time in there when a company meeting feels like a welcome interruption.

yuta considers leaving yuto be and starting to eat on his own. yuto bent over a guitar, engrossed, playing with melodies tends to result in good ideas and improvements to yuta’s material. but yuta isn’t thinking about music right now.

“dinner’s ready,” he says in a mock-nagging voice, slapping the back of yuto’s head in passing. “put that thing away.”

yuto grumbles but lays the guitar down beside him and scoots up towards the table. yuta, returning from the kitchen with a glass of water, takes a seat on the couch across from him. usually he would probably have turned on the tv, but yuta doesn’t touch the remote lying next to him.

“hey,” he says after a couple minutes. “you noticed something?” he knows that it’s a completely useless way to start a conversation, but he also knows that yuto is used to it and too kind to complain about it.

“what?” yuto grunts, not turning his attention away from his food.

yuta stalls, pretending to want to swallow before speaking. he has thought about how to bring this up, but still isn’t entirely sure. “been seeing a lot of gay people in the media lately.”

yuto glances up at him. “huh?”

“i don’t mean it’s a bad thing,” yuta hurries to amend. “just something i noticed. more queer characters in dramas and movies than a couple years ago. more celebrities coming out.”

“hm,” yuto says. “like who?”

“well, that guy, yamaguchi, who was in _score of life_. turns out he’s dating the second lead from _sparrow’s wing._ ”

yuto squints at him. “hayashi ryota?”

yuta nods. “yeah, him. also nagano rena, from _demon’s bride_.” yuta brings up his hands, starting to count on his fingers. “kato yuna, from that girl group, _triple threat._ ando junki, who was in _resurrection._ uehara rin. ikemoto, uh, something… you know, the guy with long hair. tanaka yuya.”

yuto raises a brow at him. “have you researched this, or what?”

yuta gives a light shrug. “i looked around. also, remember that chick, coco from ABK28? she came out as bi earlier this year. it was a pretty hot issue, but it’s been a total boost for her career. she’s doing tons of CFs now. same with ando junki. he scored that role shortly after he came out.”

“huh,” yuto says again. “cool. i didn’t know.”

“yeah, many are doing well.” yuta picks up his chopsticks, but doesn’t start eating again. “things really seem to have changed for the community. like, just look at _increased blue_. a gay lead couple on a mainstream cable drama? you wouldn’t have seen that a couple years ago.

yuto hums. “good for them.”

“yeah, it’s great. i mean, i’m not gay or anything, but it really shows some progress in our society. you shouldn’t have to hide who you are or who you love. you shouldn’t be held back in your career just because you like dick or whatever.”

yuto puts down his bowl and sits back, looking straight at him. “where are you going with this?”

yuta licks his lips. damn yuto for knowing him so well.

“well, i was just thinking,” he says. “what can _i_ do for them, you know? i have a voice, an audience. i should use it to make a difference, to help people.”

“what do you have in mind?”

yuta tucks a strand of hair behind his ear. “i was thinking. what if i… y’know. date a guy.”

yuto frowns. “but you’re not gay.”

“no,” yuta says patiently. “it wouldn’t be for real. it would be a part of the concept for the new album. artists often portray different roles in their performances and music videos. sometimes they build whole personas from it.” he waves a hand around, as if it will help him get his point across. “it’s just, like, another way of expressing yourself. of telling a story. a kind of performance art, if you will.”

yuto hums again. “so… it’s a publicity stunt?”

“uh, well.” yuta clears his throat. “that’s another way to put it.”

yuto snorts and starts laughing. “so, you see all this progress for the gay community, and your first thought is, ‘ _how can this benefit me_ ’?”

yuta groans. “of course it sounds bad if you put it like that.” he runs a hand through his hair, pushing long bangs out of his face. “it wouldn’t be just for my own sake. it could make a difference. normalize gay relationships and stuff. a big artist like me, dating a dude, like no big deal. we don’t even need to label it. just, free love, y’know? _that’s_ progress.”

“uh-huh,” yuto says. he picks up his bowl again, but he’s still grinning.

“also, you know our fans will love it. they’ll be all over that shit.”

“before you ask - no, i will not play the role of your fake boyfriend.”

yuta scowls and tosses a salt packet at him. “fuck off. i wasn’t gonna ask you.”

“thanks.” yuto scoops a load of food into his mouth. “so. say you find a guy willing to go along with this. what are you planning? a big coming out? and then break up once promos are over?”

“no,” yuta says. he tugs at one of his earrings. “i dunno. we don’t have to announce anything. we can just go out together a couple times, have some paps take pics of us, and then… go our separate ways.”

“okay.” yuto chews contemplatively. “so are you gonna reveal the ruse afterwards?”

yuta shakes his head.

“why not? it would generate even more buzz. you could spin it as social commentary.”

“ _bad_ buzz,” yuta says. “it’s too risky. it would just backfire on us. not all publicity is good publicity, you know.”

“alright. so you’re just gonna… never mention it again?”

“what, i don’t have to talk about my exes? that’s private.” yuta splays his hands out. “what’s the big deal? this isn’t gonna harm anyone unless it gets out. best case scenario i do my share to support a good cause, and maybe score a gig or two out of it. worth a shot. don’t you think?”

yuto chuckles. “if you say so, man.”

yuta crosses his arms over his chest. “so you think it’s a bad idea?”

“queer-baiting your fans?” yuto shrugs. “i wouldn’t say it’s a _good_ idea. but if you wanna do it, sure. you might just pull it off.”

“so you’ll have my back?” yuta asks. he considers adding _i can’t do this without you_ , but that’s just gonna sound needy. “i mean, your job kind of depends on my job. if shit goes south, you’d go down with me.”

“i always have your back,” yuto says, not looking up from his bowl. he says it so casually, like he doesn’t even have to think about it. it makes a warm little twinge flare in yuta’s chest. “no matter what stupid shit you cook up.”

yuta grins, leaning back and propping his arms up on the backrest. “when have i done stupid shit? all my ideas are brilliant.”

yuto laughs again, but yuta lets it slide.

“you know, though,” yuto adds, pointing at him with his spoon. “you’re gonna have to run this by myao too.”

yuta sighs. “yeah. i know.”

the NCT Records headquarters are located in a sleek, chrome-and-glass skyscraper in upper shibuya. yuta strolls in after lunch, spending a couple minutes flirting with the receptionist before making his way down the wide corridors, stopping at a door that says _Miyazaki Miho, Artist Agent_ on a stylish black sign. he gives the wood a couple of quick raps with his knuckle.

“come in,” calls a voice from inside.

“myao-chan,” yuta greets as he enters, firing off his most charming grin. “how’s it going?”

myao’s lips tighten into a patient little line that might be called a smile. “yuta-kun,” she says. “you know, i would appreciate if you’d make an appointment before coming in.”

she looks small behind her sprawling desk, covered in papers, folders and gadgets. she’s thirty-ish, in a powder pink blazer, nude makeup and with perfectly straightened hair dyed a modest chestnut brown.

“come on.” yuta takes the liberty of flopping down into the chair across from her, not waiting for an invitation. “do you have anything more important to do than me?”

if she caught the innuendo, she ignores it. “NCT has a large roster. you’re not the only artist i represent.”

as if to prove a point, one of her phones rings. she raises a neatly manicured finger at him while reaching to answer. “miyazaki miho speaking. oh, yamada-san, hello.”

yuta scoots down in his seat, obediently keeping his mouth shut while she talks.

myao’s office is nothing like the cupboard at the end of the hall that has maru’s name on it, but on the other hand she spends a lot more time in here than he does in his. the room has a large window facing the glazed facades of more skyscrapers. a couch and a mini-fridge - tell-tale signs of a workaholic. the walls are covered in framed pictures; myao shaking hands with top-level corporate suits, myao next to prominent celebrities, a younger myao in sparkly outfits.

she used to be an idol back in the days, but her career failed to take off and when she aged out of the system she went into management instead. she used to be pretty hot, too, before one too many trips to the plastic surgeon left her with comically large, puffy eyes and a suspiciously pointy chin. but you shouldn’t let her slight frame and innocent face fool you - this is a no-bullshit kind of woman. she speaks three languages; is sharp, dedicated, and damn good at her job.

after a minute or two myao puts down her phone and turns to him again. “so. what brings you in?”

yuta leans forward in his seat. “i have an idea.”

“an idea?”

“yeah. regarding marketing of the new album.”

myao folds her arms over her chest. “okay. let’s hear it.”

yuta lays out his plan - an abridged, less rambly version of what he presented to yuto. myao listens in silence, not moving, a wrinkle slowly forming between her brows as he talks.

“so, let me get this straight…” she says finally when he has finished. “a fake boyfriend?”

“yeah.” yuta nods nonchalantly. getting people on your side is all about exuding confidence. “guys dating guys is all the rage right now. and you know how my fanbase is. trust me, this is gonna garner attention.”

myao purses her lips. “what does adachi think about this?”

yuta feels a sting of irritation. “yuto? who cares what he thinks? i’m the star here, aren’t i?”

“well, i know that _you_ care what he thinks.”

yuta licks his lips. myao also knows him a little too well. “well, don’t worry. he’s in on it.”

“alright.” myao gives a shrug. “so, who do you have in mind?”

yuta scratches the back of his head. “i don’t know yet.”

myao raises her brows. “you don’t know?”

“it should be someone famous. someone up and coming. someone unexpected, for maximum effect.”

myao laughs. “okay. and when you do find a good candidate - how do you plan to ask him? go, _hey, i’m looking for an accomplice in a morally questionable marketing stunt?_ ”

“of course not. i’d be smooth about it. you know that.”

“well, you’d certainly have to be. if you go ahead with this, it cannot get out.” she points a slim finger in his face. “not before, not during, not after. your reputation would tank if people found out the truth - and ours with it. you’ll have to operate on a need-to-know basis.”

yuta grins. “so that’s a yes? you’ll allow it?”

myao sighs, slumping back in her hair. “i guess so. it’s risky, and it’s dumb, but you have a sense for this stuff. every time you come in here with some weird marketing plan i think it’s going to fail, but you pull it off.” she sets a sharp gaze on him. “and it’s primarily your own career you’re gambling with. so i assume you’ll be taking this seriously.”

“i’m always serious when it comes to business,” yuta says. “but don’t worry. it will work out. i know it will.”

a smile tugs at myao’s mouth. “always so full of confidence, huh?”

“why wouldn’t i be?”

myao snorts. “fair enough.” she leans forward again, pulling up a calendar on her sleek computer screen. “you have a limited time-frame here, though. we can push the album release a couple of weeks, but the execs want it out before the summer. if you don’t find someone soon, maybe it’s better to let this thing wait till your next comeback.”

“fine,” yuta says. “and if you have any suggestions, feel free to share, okay?”

“sure, i’ll keep my eyes open. keep me posted.”

maru drops him off at the airport in the morning. maru usually goes with him on work trips, but when he’s just heading over to seoul to appear on johnny’s show and hang out with friends, yuta prefers going alone.

“take care, okay,” maru tells him when he’s getting out of the car.

yuta grins at him. “don’t worry. i’m a big boy.”

maru rolls his eyes. “right.”

yuta grabs his suitcase out of the trunk and heads for the doors, heeled boots clicking against the sidewalk. as always he has carefully picked out a casual but stylish outfit in case there are photographers or fans around. hair styled in a “messy” ponytail; earrings and jewelry to complete the look. airports are a runway, you can’t show up in sweats no matter how tired or hungover you are.

and yes - there is a loose gaggle of girls in high school uniforms loitering near the check-in counter for _korean air_. they immediately start poking each other when they spot him, breaking out in low squeals and giggles.

yuta dips his head to hide his smirk. he’s tempted to stroll over there, chat for a minute, tease them about skipping class for him; give them something to keysmash about on the fanboards tonight. but he shouldn’t encourage them. having mobs of fans follow him around everywhere would be very inconvenient.

he settles for shooting them a wave and one of his ‘healing smiles’ in passing, heading for the end of the line with quick, firm strides and hoping they won’t get too close. he looks at his phone while waiting, pretending not to notice the daring ones snapping pics. the elderly woman in front of him gives him a long glance over her shoulder, seemingly perplexed by the attention.

“do you want help with your luggage, ma’am?” he asks in perfect korean. it’s a guess, but he tends to be correct. he adds a sugary smile for good measure, and the lady immediately melts.

“thank you, son, but i’ll be fine.”

switching between his two languages still comes like second nature. yuta lived in korea for twelve years - almost half his life. his family moved to seoul when he was seven, when his father got tenure teaching japanese language and literature at yonsei university.

luckily yuta was young enough that he sucked up the language like a sponge. well, he pretty much had to; to be able to talk to anyone, to be able to keep up in class. it was harder for his older sister. yuta’s father, ever ambitious, wanted his kids to go to a regular korean school, but also paid an evening tutor to cultivate their knowledge of their mother tongue and japanese culture.

when he’s through processing yuta heads for the VIP lounge closest to his gate, not needing to check the map or signs for directions. he flashes his platinum card to the door attendant and slumps down in a plush armchair in a corner.

yuta has shuttled between narita and incheon more times than he can count, and he usually takes the time in transit as an opportunity to catch up on sleep or get some work done. but despite having half an hour till boarding, he doesn’t take his laptop or notepad out of his designer-brand backpack.

he has spent the days since the meeting with myao trawling his brain and the internet, trying to come up with a suitable candidate for The Plan. it got to the point where yuto called him out for not paying attention in the studio.

there are plenty of fine, young, male celebrities who would look great next to him. but the trickiest part is how to go about it.

myao is right - he can’t just walk up to someone and ask. by simply posing the question he’s implicating the dude in the whole thing, and thereby adding a person who might expose it. it needs to be someone he can trust.

after several years in the industry he’s got dirt on a good number of celebs. could he blackmail someone into doing it? the option occurred to him but he quickly dismissed it. that could get ugly.

despite his cocky, devil-may-care image, yuta carefully avoids doing things that might make someone harbour unnecessary grudges against him. you can’t please everyone, and sometimes you need to step on other people to get ahead. showbiz is rough. it’s a dog-eat-dog world out there and you need to be prepared to fight tooth and nail to get what you want, if you plan on getting anywhere. but there’s no point in making people hate him unless it’s for a considerable gain. being likeable and good at networking is a much safer and more prosperous strategy.

he could approach someone young and new to the scene, someone who would be star-struck and flattered by yuta’s proposal and desperate enough to want to leech off his fame, sucking whatever attention he could get out of the arrangement. but someone like that might also stroll off and sell the whole story to the tabloids afterwards, to squeeze an extra publicity boost out of the whole thing.

yuta groans to himself, sinking further down into the cushioning. maybe he should let this go for now, like myao said. let it wait till his next comeback. even though recording is finished, he still has work to do - meetings, creative management, filmings and jacket shoots. he needs to stay focused, keep his mind in the game.

“hate to say it, folks, but it’s close to six pm, meaning it’s time to wrap this up. as always, i’ve had a blast, and i hope you all did too. big thanks to my bro nakamoto yuta for coming on the show despite his busy schedule.”

yuta leans in towards the microphone. “thanks for having me.”

“i’m here every weekday, four to six, to keep you all company so make sure to check in again tomorrow; same channel, same frequency. we’re leaving you today with park bohyung’s smooth hit, _evergreen_.” the intro of the song starts playing, but johnny continues with expert calm, eyes resting on the digital clock on the wall, seconds ticking away. “you’ve probably heard it before and you probably wanna hear it again. well, i’m johnny seo and this has been _the afternoon grind_. peace out!”

he stretches the last syllable, a high-pitched diphthong fading out just as park bohyung starts singing. johnny hits a button on his control board, and the red _on-air_ light above the door goes out. the producer gives them a thumbs up through the window into the studio. johnny takes off his bulky headphones and turns to yuta, grinning.

“good job today,” he says, reaching over to slap yuta on the shoulder. “you’re a natural.”

“i’ve been on here like a hundred times by now.”

johnny cackles. “that’s true.”

yuta tries to guest on johnny’s radio show on a regular basis; at least once a month or so. it’s an easy gig and a good way to connect with the korean side of yuta’s fandom. and the station is happy to invite him, the spike in ratings always looking good on the monthly report. johnny, too, has gained popularity with yuta’s fans thanks to their joint activities.

it certainly doesn’t hurt to have friends in the industry if you want to be a celebrity.

johnny collects his papers in a messy stack. “i have some shit to do, but it won’t take more than ten minutes. fifteen, tops. then we can get outta here.”

“sure.” yuta trails after him out of the studio, lingering to chat with the staff. someone asks him to sign an album for their daughter or niece or whatever, and of course yuta complies, trying not to let the smug excitement be too obvious on his face. he draws a black little heart below his well-practiced autograph.

soon enough johnny comes back for him and they head down to the garage at the bottom of the broadcasting building, where johnny unlocks the doors to his sleek ride with a beep from his pocket.

“you’re staying till tomorrow night, right?” johnny asks when they’re rolling out on the busy seoul streets. “i’m throwing a bash.”

“yeah, you mentioned.” yuta checks himself in the side-view mirror, running his fingers through his hair to retrieve it some volume after being squashed under the earphones for two hours. “and yeah, i don’t have to go back till sunday. as long as you don’t mind me crashing on your couch.”

johnny laughs. “don’t worry, i’ll kick you out when i get tired of you.”

“is it a club event?”

“nah, just a small thing at my place.”

johnny has also built a life for himself during the last eight years. alongside the popular radio show, he’s regularly on TV; hosting or appearing on game shows or talk shows. he also has an impressive online presence, with millions of views on his vlog series, titled _johnny’s communication center_ (the episodes featuring yuta are, of course, extra popular).

yuta is not surprised at his success - johnny is funny, handsome, a smooth talker, good with people. his exclusive parties are well-known in the younger circles of the industry, invitations highly coveted by aspiring celebs. other than getting to hang with the hip crowd, it’s a great place for making business connections.

they went to the same high school, and johnny was one of the members of yuta’s first real band. he played the drums, and did an okay job at it, but yuta would still take ogawa over him any day of the week. at the time, it didn’t matter much, though. which shitty high school band doesn’t sound rough and messy? they were young and inexperienced, writing noisy songs with pretentious lyrics, thinking they knew anything about the world.

of course, yuta isn’t sleeping on the couch, per se. johnny has a loft-style flat with a terrace and two guestrooms in a trendy area of gangnam. they wake up late the next day, spending a couple hours dicking around, playing video games in their underwear. it would almost feel like they’re 18 again if it wasn’t for the sprawling leather sofa and the massive screen of the TV.

in the afternoon yuta assists with the preparations, like hauling in and unloading the boxes of bottles and cans johnny ordered for delivery. the decorations are sparse and sophisticated; johnny sets up the lightscape with his laptop, ordering his array of high-tech bulbs to shine in hues of green and blue in select parts of the lounge. he prepares his carefully curated playlist, making sure the system of hidden speakers is connected and working. the usual bartender comes in around eight, giving johnny a fist-bump before heading over to the built-in bar and starting to set up.

“by the way,” johnny says when yuta comes out of his room, showered and dressed (black jacket over a boldly patterned shirt, top three buttons undone). “i invited taeyong.” his tone is casual, but yuta sees the way he glances at him, like asking a silent question.

yuta resists the urge to purse his lips. if it was a problem, it’s a little late to mention it now, don’t you think? “cool,” he says. “i haven’t seen him in a while.”

guests start dropping in around nine. yuta nods at familiar faces, acting as back-up host when necessary. he smirks when he overhears a pair of girls in heavy eyeshadow and too-high heels recognize him behind his back; _oh my god, is that nakamoto yuta?_ cue giggles and stifled squeals.

he’s just about to head over and introduce himself, maybe offer them a round of drinks, when lee taeyong walks into the room. he pauses at the edge of the lounge, scanning over the crowd, and immediately lights up when spotting yuta.

“yukkeuri,” he calls, waving with his whole arm.

yuta grimaces at the old nickname. he manages to wrestle it into a grin, and goes to meet him.

“i didn’t know you were in town.” taeyong ropes him into a big hug, slapping his back.

“well, i managed to squeeze it in.”

“it’s been forever. good to see you.” taeyong steps back, grinning. “what are you working on these days?” this standard question, mandatory when running into old friends. god forbid you don’t have an interesting answer.

“got a new album coming out soon,” yuta says, wondering if taeyong doesn’t check his SNS, if he hasn’t seen the hints and recording studio selfies yuta has been uploading. “can’t give any details, but it’s some exciting stuff. gonna be real cool.”

taeyong beams at him. “can’t wait to check it out!”

yuta laughs modestly. “i’ll send you a signed copy.” then you have to return the favor. “so what about you?”

“oh, you know, a little of this and that.” taeyong runs a hand through his hair, currently dyed an electric shade of blue. “been producing some music, working with some new names. just filmed a music video this week, for _youngblood_ , heard of them? no? ah, well, anyway, they have some rad tracks. and the brand is doing pretty well, we’re releasing a new collection next month. spring/summer, ready-to-wear.” he grins, nodding, the motion seeming to travel all the way down his body in some kind of jittery, excited tic.

again, yuta gets the feeling that they’re still eighteen. like no time has passed at all.

taeyong and him go way back. he was also a member of yuta’s and johnny’s high school band - the singer, guitarist, and primary songwriter. could rap like gunfire, shred the axe like a pro, had a presence and pattern of movement that made him mesmerizing on stage.

he’s a true artist, bursting at the seams with creativity, never scared to try something new. when the band broke up and yuta ran off to japan, taeyong went to college and got himself a degree in applied music. yuta checked out some of his senior year projects and wasn’t surprised to hear that various industry scouts were basically fighting over him when he graduated. but taeyong never signed with a big label, instead seeming to prefer the underground and indie circles he still hangs in. living paycheck to paycheck probably, certainly not in any gangnam flat, but getting to go his own way. nobody telling him what to do.

“TEE-WHY!” johnny appears out of seemingly nowhere, slapping taeyong on the arm with enough excited force to make him stumble. “you made it!”

taeyong laughs, turning his attention away from yuta. “of course!”

yuta takes the opportunity to glide away. he makes a beeline for the bar to pick up a beer and then slowly heads towards the balcony doors, bopping his head to the music like he’s just checking out the party. he needs some fresh air.

the terrace is empty, so far. the dark corners tend to be a prime hotspot for private conversations and making out, but the night air is chilly and most female guests, as usual, scantily dressed.

yuta shuffles up to the railing, cracking his can open. the cityscape spreads out in front of him, glittering in a spectrum of colors. up here, the constant noise of car engines and beeping horns sounds muted and distant. clouds hang overhead, colored a greyish orange, as always tainted by light pollution. a gentle wind tugs at loose strands of his hair.

yuta can make out the shape of a figure in one of the nearby office towers, bent over a desk in one of hundreds of uniform windows. probably a low-level salary man, crunching numbers, working late on a friday evening to finish some report or other so his boss won’t yell at him.

yuta feels his fingers tighten around the can. he can’t imagine living like that. an anonymous cog in the corporate machinery. you work and work and then you die. at most you leave behind a kid or two to remember you.

he’d rather live on the street and starve.

yuta turns away, leaning his back against the railing. he sips his beer and watches the guests moving around behind the sheer curtains hanging over the tall windows. a young woman saunters by, probably a model from the looks of it, all legs and smooth flowing hair.

maybe he should try to get laid tonight. he has a guest bedroom with a door that locks and no plans in the morning. it’s been a while; he could use to blow off some steam before he goes back to tokyo and the comeback preparations kick in for real.

someone slips out through the half-open door and comes towards him on the dark terrace.

“oh, yuta-hyung. i thought it was you.”

yuta recognizes the voice, and the next moment jung jaehyun steps into a strip of light falling through a window.

“oh, hey.” yuta straightens up, grabbing jaehyun’s extended hand to bump their shoulders together.

“long time no see.” jaehyun grins. “how’s it going?”

jaehyun is a friend of johnny’s; an actor and part-time model, which is just what you would guess from looking at him. his face looks like it was designed in a sophisticated computer program, and his thin silky button-up hints at the sculpted body completing the impeccable image.

yuta had a cameo on one of jaehyun’s dramas a couple years back. it was just a silly romcom and yuta was cast as a high schooler despite being well over twenty, but it was a fun gig and got him some exposure with the korean audience. those three days of filming weren’t enough to get to know each other, but jaehyun is also a regular guest at johnny’s parties and radio show. they’ve hung in the same circles for so long that they’ve become acquainted through osmosis.

“good,” yuta says. “it’s going well. been busy.”

jaehyun hums, leaning back next to him. “the good kind of busy?”

yuta lets out a laugh. “is there a bad kind?” he flips some hair out of his face. “i’m working on a new album. it’s intense, but it’s fun.”

“that’s cool.”

“what about you?”

jaehyun shrugs. “i’m kinda between jobs at the moment. i was in _under your sky_ last, it just finished airing. have you seen it?”

“oh, yeah,” yuta lies. he saw the trailers, has a vague idea of the plot. “i watched some of it. you, uh… did a good job with the role.”

jaehyun smiles. “thanks. anyway, i’m kinda taking it easy right now, looking for my next project, y’know.”

yuta hums and takes a sip of his beer. “that’s a smooth way of saying you’re unemployed.”

jaehyun looks at him and snorts out a laugh. it comes so suddenly he seems surprised by it himself. he gives yuta a light punch on the arm. “i’m not. i still have an agent and all. i’m not a washed up has-been yet.”

“sorry.” yuta giggles, slightly relieved. he has tendency to whip out banter too early. it can misfire. “and don’t worry. you’re still young.”

“oh, am i, wise one?” jaehyun drawls. “you’re, what, two years older than me?”

yuta gives him a gentle punch back. “i just mean. you’re talented, handsome. you have something. they’re not gonna let that go to waste.”

“okay then.” jaehyun looks down, almost seeming shy for a moment. “well, thank you.” he shifts around, leaning his elbow on the railing. “a new album, huh? have you filmed your music video yet? i could be in it.”

yuta gives a cackle. “are you that desperate?”

“what?” jaehyun’s grin twinkles playful. “i would basically be doing you a favor.”

“right,” yuta hums. “you got a big following in japan?”

“aren’t half of your fans korean anyway?”

“i have fans all over the world, but i’m a japanese artist. _the guitar samurai._ you can take me out of japan, but you can’t take japan out of me.”

jaehyun laughs; a dark, melodic sound. “alright. well, it would have been cool.” he stuffs his hands in the pockets of his dark jeans. “damn, it’s freezing out here. i think i’m gonna head back inside.” he pauses, eyes on yuta’s face. yuta distantly realizes it’s an invitation for him to follow, but he’s suddenly distracted.

“see you around, i guess?” jaehyun says after a moment.

“sure,” yuta mumbles. a memory has surfaced from the depths of his mind, slowly piecing itself together as he watches jaehyun leave.

there was a rumour a couple years ago. it could have blown up to a proper scandal, but maybe there were bigger things to report that week, or the people involved weren’t famous enough at the time. also likely that jaehyun’s fans are the protective kind who would launch an aggressive censoring campaign against anything that might injure his spotless image.

either way, there were speculations about jaehyun and another male actor. something about them being unusually close, couple’s jewelry, being spotted together at a hip, open-minded club.

nothing was officially confirmed or denied, and by the time jaehyun’s next drama started airing the whole thing seemed forgotten. yuta forgot about it as well, evidently. it was barely a blip on his radar - a passing mention of someone he barely knew.

yuta strongly believes that celebrities have a right to privacy. he shares a lot with his fans; loves talking and communicating with them, giving them details of his life. but there are things best left behind closed doors, both for their sake and your own. some people will try to prey on your secrets, but nobody’s entitled to them. there’s nothing wrong in keeping things to yourself if you can.

but it’s not yuta’s fault if something private happened to reach him.

yuta inches along the fence till his line of vision falls into the next window, where he can glimpse jaehyun stopping to chat with someone yuta doesn’t know.

jaehyun has been in the industry five-or-so years. he’s a young talent in the beginnings of a promising career. he is - to put it plainly - gorgeous. and, for what it’s worth, doesn’t seem averse to same-sex relationships.

these parties can get rowdy. they’ve all seen messy sides of each other, shit you don’t want leaked to the media. but shit doesn’t get leaked, because of this silent mutual understanding, the celeb solidarity. and because every fresh-faced wannabe knows that if you go running your mouth you can say bye-bye to every future event and networking opportunity.

jaehyun is smart, ambitious, knows how the industry works. but more importantly; johnny knows him. johnny trusts him. which means that yuta can trust him as well. jaehyun wouldn’t snitch.

yuta spends the evening circling, skulking like a predator in the shadows, silently debating it with himself. he knew it’s risky. yuto and myao both made it clear to him what a potentially idiotic idea this is. but nothing ventured, nothing gained, right? he can’t get cold feet now.

he approaches jaehyun when people start dropping off, palms damp because he’s only been drinking juice and club soda for the past two hours. you don’t show up to business appointments drunk.

“hey, jaehyun?” yuta clears his throat. “can i talk to you for a minute?”

jaehyun’s eyebrows lift, but he nods. “sure.”

yuta cocks his head and jaehyun follows him, away from the lounge, down the hall, all the way to the guest rooms. yuta opens his door and gestures jaehyun inside. jaehyun complies, but frowns in confusion when yuta turns the lock behind them.

“um,” he says. “hyung. what’s up?”

“oh,” says yuta who only just now realized what this might look like. “nothing. i just wanna talk.”

“about what?”

yuta considers offering jaehyun a seat at the armchairs in the corner, but doesn’t want to make this weirder than necessary.

“look,” he says, taking a step closer so he can lower his voice. “i have an _idea._ ”


	2. Chapter 2

jaehyun stares at him with a doubtful frown. “you… want me to be your boyfriend?”

“ _fake_ boyfriend,” yuta quickly corrects him. “this is purely business, nothing personal. and i’m not asking for a long term commitment. we’re talking a month or two, tops.”

jaehyun nods slowly. “so... you’re not gay?”

yuta shakes his head. “no. i’m just an ally.”

“i see,” jaehyun says carefully. 

yuta slides his sweaty palms into his back pockets. “so, what do you think?”

“uh,” jaehyun says. “well. i have a question.”

“yeah?” yuta takes an eager step forward. “shoot.”

“what’s in it for me?”

yuta licks his lips. “well, you’d be seen with me. my fans would get curious and check out your work, and stuff. we’d both get good press from this.”

jaehyun raises a brow. “that’s it?”

“uh,” yuta says. “you can be in my music video?”

a faint grin stretches jaehyun’s mouth. “how generous.”

“hey, you’re the one who wanted it.” yuta crosses his arms over his chest. “what do you want? we both have connections. this could be a mutually beneficial arrangement.” he bites his lip for a moment, hesitating. it’s a gamble, but he goes for it; “you shouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth, when you’re _between jobs_ and all.”

jaehyun’s face stiffens. for a moment yuta expects him to sweep past him and storm out. but then jaehyun breathes in sharply and looks away.

“i need to think about it.” 

“oh. sure,” yuta says quickly. “that’s okay. take your time. i’m leaving tomorrow but you can call me. or i’ll call you. either way works. you have my number? or you can just ask johnny.”

“yeah.” jaehyun takes his phone out of his pocket to check the time, or pretend to. “look, i gotta go. but, uh... we’ll be in touch.”

he’s already halfway past yuta, heading towards the door.

“okay.” yuta says. “cool. later.”

the door falls closed, leaving him alone in the room. the beat from the music still playing in the lounge seeps faintly through the walls.

yuta stumbles over and sinks down into one of the uncomfortable, stylish armchairs johnny decided to decorate his guest rooms with. his armpits feel uncomfortably wet under his jacket. he wrings it off, head spinning with potential headlines he might wake up to tomorrow; 

_...‘rockstar nakamoto yuta tried to solicit me into an exploitative marketing ploy,’ says korean actor, 25..._

_...rockstar nakamoto yuta caught cruising for gay hookups under the guise of ‘a business venture’..._

_...rising star nakamoto yuta… exposed… disgraced…_

yuta drags a hand through his hair, shaking his head to interrupt the increasingly implausible train of thought. _fucking chill,_ he tells himself. jaehyun is not that kind of person. he has come way beyond selling gossip for a quick buck. that’s not how you make it in this industry.

lo and behold, there are no scandalous headlines waiting for yuta when he wakes up the next morning. no urgent messages or angry voicemails from yuto or myao. he lies in bed with his phone and draws a silent breath of relief. 

he’s not really expecting jaehyun to contact him. but even if this attempt failed, at least he seems to have gotten through the ordeal unscathed. yuta bids johnny goodbye, takes a cab to the airport and goes back home.

nothing more happens until a couple nights later. yuta’s at the gym, working on getting his arms taut and toned because he’s planning a sleeveless look for his music video, when he gets a text from an unknown number.

_this is jaehyun. call me?_

yuta feels his pulse speed up a little, completely unrelated to his work-out. he grabs his stuff and heads straight for the elevator, foot tapping against the floor tiles as it climbs up towards his floor. he quickly swipes his keycard at the door, dumps his bag on the hallway floor and starts pacing around the living room, waiting for his breathing to calm before hitting _call_.

two beeps, three. then a click, and jaehyun’s voice; 

“hello?”

“hey,” yuta says, expertly casual. “it’s yuta.”

“can you talk?” 

it’s a mundane politeness, but yuta knows jaehyun isn’t wondering if he’s busy. “yeah, i’m at home. alone.”

“oh. okay. good.” there is a pause, some rustling in the background. “so. i’ve thought about it and…” jaehyun seems to hesitate. yuta’s fingers clench around his phone. he feels a drop of sweat roll down his neck. “if the offer still stands... i’m in.”

yuta tightens his fingers in a silent victory fist. “oh. cool.”

"but." 

"but?" 

"we need to negotiate the terms of this agreement." 

yuta clears his throat. "alright.” he's not surprised jaehyun's whipping out his inner business man. it’s clearly not his first time at the rodeo. "what do you have in mind?" 

“if we’re gonna do this we might as well do it properly. why stop at a music video and some blurry date pics? we can take it further, really milk this thing.” jaehyun pauses again, but now his voice is quick and smooth. “i have a couple of gigs you can join me for, if you do the same for me. like you said; you scratch my back, i scratch yours. it would help both of us expand our networks. get some extra exposure.”

“wow,” yuta says. “alright. sounds good to me.” 

“we need to plan this out properly. not over the phone. i can come to tokyo. bring my manager, meet your people, discuss it through.”

“okay. when can you come? it’d be best if we could kick this off ASAP.”

“i can get on a plane tomorrow. like i said, my schedule’s pretty empty right now. i just gotta check with doyoung-hyung.”

“awesome,” yuta says, head kind of spinning with the speed at which everything is suddenly happening. 

“can you set up an appointment this week?”

“uh, sure.” yuta runs his free hand through his sweaty bangs. “also, for the record. i’m sure you realize this is a pretty… sensitive project. we shouldn’t involve more people than necessary.”

jaehyun laughs over the line. “dude, don’t worry. i’m aware. i won’t be telling anyone.”

“not even johnny.”

“you’re right. not even johnny.”

“jung jaehyun?” myao’s half yelling into her phone. “you bagged fucking _jung jaehyun?_ ”

“do you know him?”

“do i know him?” myao sounds almost offended. “he was in _blue magnolia_ and _lone wolf_ , he’s been named one of the top ten sexiest men in asia, he’s been on the front cover of vogue. he’s super popular with female audiences, both the teen and young adult categories.”

yuta smirks to himself. “coincidentally, my main demographic as well.”

myao laughs over the line. “that’s right.” there’s the sound of papers and myao mumbling. “damn, this could really turn into something.”

“i told you,” yuta drawls, leaning back in his office chair. “why do you still doubt me?”

myao ignores him. “we have to set up a meeting.”

“yeah, he’s coming over to tokyo this week.”

“this week? damn, you’re moving fast. is friday okay?”

“probably. i’ll check with him. but also, i might need your help…”

“with what?”

yuta taps a finger against his desk. “he’s ambitious. he wants to make it bigger. a quid pro quo deal.”

“well, what does he want?”

“connections, opportunities. gigs we can do together. oh, and i promised to let him be in my music video.”

“you promised to _let_ him?”

yuta gives a cackle. “he practically begged for it.”

“oh, yuta-kun,” myao says, and suddenly her voice has turned pleading. “this is serious. you’ve got a real opportunity here. you can’t fuck it up. you have to stay on his good side. can you keep your ego in check for a while?”

“my _ego?_ what ego?” yuta scoffs. “i told you, relax. i’ve got this. jaehyun and i already know each other. we’ve worked together before. it’s gonna be a breeze.”

“okay. i’m just saying.”

“noted,” yuta says, not quite managing to keep acidity out of his voice. “so, will you help me? hold up our end of the bargain.”

“of course, that’s my job,” myao says. “i’ll do my best.”

yuta checks the security cam display before opening the door, as usual. sana’s face is half obscured by her cap and sunglasses, but she has taken her mask off and is grinning cheekily up at the camera.

yuta unbolts and opens to let her in. “you’re late.”

sana makes an irritated noise. “i said nine- _ish,_ ” she says, wringing off her jacket and tossing it at him. “so sorry to keep your dick waiting.”

sana is a fellow celebrity; singer, actor, entertainer and member of female pop trio _thrice._ yuta usually isn’t into the average girl group type - sexy babyfaces singing trite sugary lovesongs in shrill, unpolished voices and dancing in sync in their matching frilly dresses. he sees them in backstage corridors; blinking up at him with their big glittery eyes. some seem intimidated by him, while others seem to be into the idea of his bad boy image. 

_thrice_ has a different, more mature concept, clearly inspired by the rise of hallyu in the country. yuta has actually liked a couple of their songs. and he could tell right away that sana isn’t like those girls.

he follows her into the lounge, hands in his pockets. “you hungry?”

sana shakes her head. “i’ve had dinner.”

“want a drink?”

she draws up close to him, eyeing him like he’s a large slice of forbidden cake. “i can’t stay too long,” she says, voice dropping. “and i just spent the whole drive here thinking about you eating me out, so...”

yuta grins. “i see.”

she leans up and kisses him, hands immediately sneaking up under his shirt. he was already sporting a semi-chub from anticipation, and now a fresh wave of blood runs to his dick.

“wait--” he mumbles against her lips. “bedroom.”

the odds of a stalker hanging out in one of the nearby buildings with a gigantic super-zoom camera are low, but the possibility always sits in the back of his head. risk assessment is crucial. people like them need to be cautious. that’s the price you pay for being rich and famous.

sana knows. she’s been around before. she leads the way, giggling, pausing a couple times to slide hands over him and put her tongue down his throat. she runs her fingers through the lengths of his hair, tugging a little. yuta smirks to himself. it’s one of the perks of growing his hair out. girls love it.

he’s prepared; fresh sheets, the blinds rolled down and lights dimmed to a flattering rosy dusk. bedside dresser well-stocked with condoms and tissues and lube, as always.

she pulls her shirt off and then she’s on him again, mouth warm and eager, fingers already working at his belt. yuta groans, staring down at her boobs in their plain, white bra without trying to hide it. they’re not big, but it’s a good pair of boobs. perky, bouncy, sensitive to the touch.

sana laughs when she sees it. she pushes him down on the bed, bending her arms back to undo the clasp while climbing on top. “don’t be shy,” she teases. “you can touch them if you want, _oppa._ ”

officially, the two of them are friends. easier than having to deny, deny, deny if she happens to be spotted outside his building or whatever. of course, there have been some dating speculations floating around the message boards, but yuta wouldn’t even have to lie if he was asked about it. it’s true that they are friends. friends that fuck each other’s brain out on the regular, but still.

yuta’s sexlife is a touchy topic in the fandom. some fans (usually older) are of the opinion that he’s a healthy adult whose hypothetical lovers are none of their business. others (mainly the teenaged ones) argue that yuta has always been honest with his fans, and that his one and true love is music. he doesn’t need to be going around banging random chicks. (clearly it’s one thing to imagine him and yuto entangled in various positions, and another when it comes to reality.)

yuta loves his fans, but there are things a man needs that they can’t give him. sure, he could have his pick - plenty of them would give an arm and leg for a night with him. but that has been his number one rule from the beginning: don’t fuck your groupies. it’s bound to get messy.

it’s safer to stick to your own kind; other celebs and industry people. people who know the rules, the importance of discretion. people who have things to lose, just like you.

they don’t cuddle when they’re done. sana takes a quick shower before putting her clothes back on. yuta pulls on a pair of sweats to follow her to the door.

“this was fun,” sana says, stepping into her shoes. “same time next week?” her playful grin glints in the low light of the hallway.

yuta snorts, scratching the back of his neck. “actually, i don’t know if we’ll be able to see each other for a while.”

“okay,” sana says, eyes on her phone. “why’s that?”

“i have a, uh, project…” he starts, then stops himself. _essential people only._ no unnecessary details. “my new album is coming out soon, and, you know. i’ll be busy.”

sana glances up at him. “that hasn’t stopped you before.”

yuta gives a shrug. “well, i’ll give you a call if i have time. i’m just saying, might not happen. so you don’t hold your breath or anything.”

sana laughs. “don’t worry about that. if you think i sit around waiting for you to text me, you’re sorely mistaken.”

yuta grins. “come on. where would you be getting better dick than this?” he gestures down to his crotch.

“doesn’t matter if you had the best dick in the universe.” sana slips her phone back into her pocket. “i still know better than to get hung up on you.”

yuta frowns. “why not?”

sana blinks at him. “come on, you know what this is. if i was looking for something serious, i wouldn’t be wasting my time on you.”

yuta crosses his arms over his chest. “what’s that supposed to mean?”

sana bites her lip, seemingly trying to think of a nice way to put it. “you’re not the relationship type. when was the last time you had an actual girlfriend? not just someone you hang out with and bang.”

yuta opens his mouth, ready to prove her wrong, but then closes it again. “uh… high school?” 

sana cackles. “see? look, it’s okay. we all prioritize our careers. i mean, we have to. that’s why i just want something casual. but you’re kind of… next level. you’re totally married to your job. you’re not available.” she gives an apologetic shrug. “plus, you kinda have a weird relationship with your fans.” 

“weird how?” yuta demands.

sana grins gently. “you know, they’re not actually your girlfriends, even if that’s the illusion you’re trying to sell.” she tilts her head, looking at him with something like pity in her eyes. “they’re gonna leave you one day, grow up and find other interests. it’s not healthy to get too attached.” 

yuta looks down, lips pursed. he doesn't say anything. 

she dives in to give him a peck on the cheek. “look, i really gotta go. later.”

the four of them sitting around yuta’s coffee table - yuta and myao on one side, jaehyun and his manager doyoung on the other - makes yuta feel vaguely like he’s about to ask for jaehyun’s hand. yuta and jaehyun, the two blushing bachelors, seeking their guardians’ approval for the union.

of course, nobody is blushing, not even myao, though yuta can tell she’s secretly pleased to get to meet _the jung jaehyun._ she hides it well under the skirt suits and professional exterior, but yuta has on good authority (maru) that she’s a total k-drama junkie.

“thank you for being able to meet us here today,” she begins, unnecessarily formal. her korean is not quite fluent, but she’s good for a non-native speaker.

“thank you for seeing us on such short notice,” kim doyoung replies most politely. he’s a bit young for the job, barely looking older than jaehyun even in his well-pressed grey business suit. but that doesn’t make yuta doubt his abilities; showbiz management is more about drive and wits than experience and seniority. 

the coffee table is set with small espresso cups and an untouched plate of local snacks. a meeting like this would usually be held in one of the company conference rooms, but they decided to meet at yuta’s instead to avoid jaehyun being unnecessarily spotted outside the NCT building. jaehyun is also in a suit, following the conversation with a bland expression of polite interest befitting a business meeting - the very one myao nags on yuta for never perfecting.

“well, we all know why we’re here,” myao says when they’re done with pleasantries. “the tentative release date for yuta’s new album is in early may. we would like it if the dating news could break a week or so before that. that gives us a rough month to plan and prepare the… um.” she clears her throat to buy time. “ _activities._ ”

“sounds good,” doyoung says. “when will the music video be filmed?”

“as soon as possible. we’re still discussing the details of the concept with the director and film team. they’re currently scouting for locations. as soon as the storyboards and costuming is finalized we’ll start shooting. but we’re very willing to be flexible to accommodate for jaehyun’s schedule.”

“we appreciate that. i trust jaehyun is given a prominent role in the video, as agreed upon?”

“oh, he’s prominent,” yuta cuts in. “it’s a love story. jaehyun is my romantic lead.” he had to scrap his originally intended title track, demoting it to a b-side. instead he picked one of the other album songs, more fitting his vision for the music video, and swiftly reworked the lyrics to indicate a theme of troubled love. they had to redo the recording but it just took an hour or so in the studio.

“that’s good,” doyoung says. if he thinks any part of this is weird, he’s very good at keeping a straight face. “jaehyun has done several roles in romantic dramas. i’m sure his acting will be satisfactory.”

“we have no doubt on that matter,” myao says immediately. “now, unfortunately the filming will take place here in japan. i hope jaehyun will be comfortable travelling back and forth during this period?”

“don’t worry,” jaehyun says, speaking for the first time since they sat down. “i’m used to moving between various locations.” he fires off a dashing heart-throb smile, no doubt carefully practiced in the mirror.

yuta can hear myao inhale very subtly next to him. “oh, that’s good,” she says, voice only shaking a smidgen.

“keep it in your pants, woman,” yuta mumbles in japanese. she tightens her lips, probably fighting the urge to elbow him in the side.

doyoung gracefully ignores the exchange. “it won’t be a problem.” he opens his briefcase and produces a couple of papers. “now, as for other activities our clients might undertake together...”

“oh, yes, of course,” myao says and opens her folder lying on the table.

when business matters are dealt with, the conversation seamlessly circles back to small talk. myao brings doyoung over to the windows to show him some feature of the skyline, answering his pleasant questions about the city.

yuta takes it upon himself to clear the table. he doesn’t notice jaehyun following him over to the kitchen until he closes the fridge and finds him casually leaned against the counter.

“some set-up you got here,” he says, nodding to the various appliances.

“oh, yeah, i guess,” yuta says. “i don’t know how to use even half of them.” he pops a left-over cookie into his mouth.

“you don’t cook much?”

“nah, i’m a shit cook,” yuta says, chewing. “do you?”

jaehyun nods. “it’s kind of a hobby of mine.” he glances over his shoulder at myao and doyoung, still standing by the window. “hey, are you free later? i was thinking we could have dinner together.”

“oh, sure. doyoung too, or?” 

“no, just the two of us. i think we need to talk, you know… unchaperoned.”

yuta snorts. “right.” he wipes his thumb over his mouth for crumbs, grinning. “does this mean you’ll cook for me?”

jaehyun chuckles. “maybe next time.”

whether it’s testament to his fame or myao’s string-pulling skills, yuta isn’t sure, but he’s satisfied myao managed to get them a reservation at one of his favorite restaurants despite the short notice. the place is crowded as always, but due to the stylishly dim lighting in the lobby nobody seems to recognize them before they’re escorted through a corridor towards the secluded section. if their waiter is at all familiar with their names he doesn’t let it show.

but it doesn’t matter if they’re seen together, yuta reminds himself. they’re supposed to be dating in a month.

the room interior follows the same minimalist, futuristic style as the rest of the place, ambiently lit from behind hovering wall panels of stainless steel. two grey armchairs on either side of a table. thick candles and a cropped, white rose floating in a bowl of water. apparently _dinner for two_ means _romantic date_ even at a hip joint like this.

an awkward silence settles between them after yuta has helped translate the menu and the waiter has left with their orders, carefully closing the door behind him. they both crack up when their eyes meet over the table.

“look, it’s just dinner,” jaehyun says.

“right,” yuta says. “like a business lunch.”

jaehyun pops the cap off the carafe of lemon water and fills up his tall wine glass. he raises his brows at yuta, who slides his glass over as well.

“so, what did you wanna talk about?”

jaehyun finishes pouring and puts the pitcher out of the way. “we need to get to know each other,” he says. “i mean, we know each other, but we don’t exactly know a lot about each other, you know?”

yuta snorts. “nobody’s gonna quiz us or anything. it’s not like you’re applying for a green card.”

jaehyun doesn’t smile. “i’m an actor,” he says. “this is just like playing a role. i need to understand my character, his feelings, motivations. who are we and why have we fallen for each other?”

“wow. you’re serious about this.”

“it’s my job. i take my work seriously.”

“alright. what do you wanna know?”

“as much as possible.”

“shit.” yuta leans back, dragging a hand through his hair. “where do i start?”

jaehyun takes a sip from his glass. “start from the beginning.”

yuta laughs. “okay.” he shifts in his seat to make himself more comfortable. this is clearly going to take a while. “i was born in osaka. october 26th, 1995. two sisters; one older and one younger. my dad’s a teacher, my mom was a housewife. we had a house in the suburbs. real ideal family shit.” he pauses, scratching his head. “you want details on my potty training and stuff?”

finally, jaehyun grins. “how did you end up in korea?”

“oh.” yuta clears his throat. “my dad got a job so we moved. it was before i started school, so i was six or something.”

“moved to a whole new country just for a teaching job?”

yuta grunts. “well, he’s a college professor. it was tenure or some prestigious shit like that, so it was a good job. well-paid.” he fiddles with the foot of his glass. “i guess it was worth it, from his point of view. but it’s not like he asked for our opinion or anything. we just had to pack up and leave. the house, the neighborhood i knew, all my friends. nothing to do but shut up and learn the language. make new friends.”

jaehyun nods slowly. “moving is always hard as a kid.”

yuta scoffs. “it’s not like just moving to a new town though. i couldn’t even talk to the other kids. they thought i was mute or stupid.”

“oh, i know what it’s like.” jaehyun shifts, propping an elbow on the armrest. “i moved to the US when i was eight. my dad’s a surgeon and did a fellowship in massachusetts. i knew, like, two words of english. also, i was the only asian kid in my class. nobody could pronounce my name.” he chuckles to himself, like at a fond memory. 

“oh,” yuta says quietly. “i didn’t know.”

jaehyun cocks his head, like half a shrug. “that’s why we’re doing this.”

yuta licks his lips. “how long did you live there?”

“four years.”

“oh. so that’s why your english is so good? i’ve wondered.”

jaehyun chuckles. “it takes some maintenance, but yeah.” when yuta doesn’t ask anything more, he continues; “did you always want to be an artist?”

yuta shakes his head. “in grade school i was all about soccer. i wanted to be a pro, of course. then, the summer when i was 12, i broke my leg. wasn’t allowed to walk, let alone run. all my friends were out all day long, kicking balls in the park. i was bored out of my mind.” he laughs. “mom dug up an old acoustic guitar for me, to keep me occupied. i started playing around with it and…” he gives a nonchalant shrug. “well, the rest is history.”

a small grin passes over jaehyun’s face. “you were in a band with johnny, right?”

“yeah, in high school. it was me and johnny and lee taeyong - you know him? he’s been at johnny’s parties a couple times.” he pauses for jaehyun’s nod. “and two more guys. we were all in the music club, then in second year we starting playing together on the weekends and stuff. it was fun. i learned a lot. we recorded a few demo songs, were thinking about sending them out to agents and stuff. but then we graduated and i ran off to japan, and…” he shrugs. “well, we wouldn’t have managed to stay together anyway.”

jaehyun’s raises a brow. “you ran off?”

yuta gives a tight smile. “well, my parents and i had… different ideas about what i should be doing with my life.” he leans forward, elbows on the table, tracing his finger along the rim of his glass. “actually, i wanted to leave way earlier. all of senior year was just, everybody cramming for the CSAT. nobody had any free time to hang out or jam. and i didn’t want any of that - i just wanted to play. make music. i knew college wasn’t for me so the whole thing just felt pointless.”

jaehyun does his slow nod, but doesn’t say anything.

“but my dad, being a professor and all, wasn’t so happy with that. held a bunch of dinner lectures on the importance of education and shit. well, i wasn’t having it. i was ready to take off, but my mom convinced me to stay till the end of the semester at least. get my diploma. then i packed up and left.”

“wow,” jaehyun says. “that’s hardcore.”

yuta cackles. “have you looked at me? i am hardcore.” he picks up his glass, swirling the water around like it’s fine wine before taking a sip.

jaehyun grins at him. “so this was… 2013?”

“2014. i got signed in 2017.”

“so what did you do those three years?”

yuta shrugs. “tried to make it. worked odd jobs, scraping by. played as much as i could. recorded crummy demos in my bedroom to send out. hunted for shitty club gigs; wherever they’d let me on stage.” he laughs. “that’s when i met yuto and we started working together. we lived in a tiny, crappy apartment. barely had space to jerk off in peace.” 

jaehyun snorts, but quickly schools his features. “you’ve worked hard.”

yuta leans back in his chair again. “i sure have. i’ve worked my ass off to get where i am. started from nothing. you won’t make it in this business if you’re not in for the grind.” 

jaehun hums. “i take it you’re still on bad terms with your parents?”

“yeah. i haven’t been back since i left. i doubt the old man would even let me in. there were some… harsh words exchanged at the end. mom calls sometimes, but that’s it.”

“i’m sorry.”

yuta shrugs again. “don’t be. i don’t need them. i’m doing great, aren’t i?”

jaehyun strokes his chin. “so, you won’t have to do any awkward, fake coming-out back home when… _you and i_ happen.”

yuta laughs. “no. i can hardly get more disowned than i already am.” he tilts his head, watching jaehyun’s face. “what about you?”

jaehyun sighs. “yeah, that’s the one part of this that i haven’t yet figured out how to handle.”

yuta grins. “alright, now it’s your turn. what’s your story?”

“oh, nothing as dramatic as yours.” jaehyun waves a hand. “i was born in seoul. after the states, we came back, so i’ve spent most of my life there.”

“siblings?” yuta asks.

jaehyun shakes his head. “i’m an only child.”

“so when did you discover your…” yuta gestures vaguely to jaehyun’s face. “talent?”

a smile slides into place on jaehyun’s mouth. it has an edge to it that wasn’t there before, but he lets the underhanded compliment slide. 

“i started doing auditions in high school. only got some small background roles and local commercials at first, but i mean…” jaehyun shrugs humbly. “that’s how most people start. i worked my way up. like you said, you gotta be willing to work hard.” he cocks his brows in yuta’s direction. “then i landed a bigger part in _midnight skies_ , and that’s when things started to take off.”

“how old were you then?”

“twenty. so i guess it’s been five years since i started doing this for real.”

yuta hums. “so you didn’t go to college either?”

“no, i did. i studied between filmings, sometimes between actual shoots. it was hard sometimes, but i made it work.”

“seriously?” yuta narrows his eyes. “don’t tell me you’re one of those straight As guys? class president? team captain? got the most chocolate on valentine’s?”

jaehyun gives a sheepish chuckle, which is answer enough. 

yuta sighs. “man, some people really got it all, huh?”

“what do you mean?”

“well, your dad’s a surgeon, so you probably grew up rich. your family lives in seoul, so i’m guessing you stayed with them until your career kicked off and you could get a place of your own.” he shoots jaehyun a glance, and jaehyun doesn’t protest. “that face and that body. handsome, popular, and brainy? that’s just not fair.”

jaehyun’s smile has suddenly turned smug. “so you think i’m hot?”

“well, i mean…” yuta shrugs. “objectively. anyone can see that.” 

“so is that your motivation?”

“what?”

“you fell for me because of my looks?”

yuta wrinkles his nose. “i wouldn’t say i’m that shallow. there must be something more to it.”

jaehyun’s smirk hasn’t dropped off his face. “alright. we’ll find it.”

yuta crosses his arms over his chest. “so what about you? what made you fall for me?”

jaehyun leans forward, humming in thought. he steers his glass in a small circle on the tabletop. “you’re ambitious. i like that. you’re smart too - maybe not the booky kind, but street-smart. and confidence is always attractive.”

 _huh._ it takes yuta a moment too long to think of something to say. “sounds like you’ve thought about this.”

“like i said. i take my job seriously.”

their eyes meet over the table. a moment passes; two. yuta licks his lips. “nothing about my looks, though? i’m hot too, you know.”

jaehyun snorts. yuta catches a movement that looks suspiciously like an eyeroll. “fine. sure.” he tilts his head, as if looking at yuta properly for the first time. “maybe i’m into men with long hair.”


End file.
